The Five Women We’d Like To See Single Again
New mom Jennifer Lopez was spotted on the lamb at “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” premiere last night, sans her husband Marc Anthony, as well as her wedding ring. Whoa! While she wasn’t showing of her rock, she was showing off her jewels in a very sexy low-cut dress. Hmm, could J.Lo be back on the market? Well, while we speculate about her single status, here are some celebs we’d actually like to see back on the market…
Miley Cyrus: First of all, she is way too young to have a live-in boyfriend who is an underwear model and 20-years-old! She should be forced to make out in movie theaters and basements with other awkward pimple-faced teens like every other 15-year-old, dammit! Besides, it’d be awesome if she managed to date all three Jonas Brothers!
Jessica Biel: All she does these days is play JT’s girlfriend. That is NOT a career lady! But we have to admit, maybe we want her to fly solo for selfish reasons. Justin could really bring the sexy back by being available to put his dick in our box.
Jennifer Aniston: She’s currently slumming it with John Mayer. He totally dissed her, she took him back, and hasn’t shut up about how wonderful he is since. Worst of all, the media fuss about them is even more of a snoozefest than a Friends’ marathon. It was better when she was on the prowl and slutting around with crazy A-listers like Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. She should take a cue from Owen’s other, much more interesting, ex-GF, Kate Hudson.
Scarlett Johansson: Getting married at 23, that’s just plain weird for a hot set of goods like ScarJo. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve thought Ryan Reynolds was a stone cold fox since “Two Guys, A Girl,And A Pizza Place,” but is she really ready to be a married woman? She’s been in a few long-term relationships and hasn’t had time to spread her love across L.A.’s elite.
Rihanna: RiRi is a mega talent on top of the world and she’s strutting around with Chris Brown, who reportedly doesn’t like her to wear those super high-fashion skank outfits she loves. Now his influence is making her cover up in weird ways and she’s ending up on the year’s worst-dressed lists. Ugh! Stop holding our diva back! It’s time for her to graduate from her high school sweetheart and meet some college boys who can keep up with her.