A 9-Year-Old Pick-Up Artist Shares His Secrets

Holy adorableness. While Mystery, “The Pick-Up Artist,” makes our hair stand up on its ends, the 9-year-old version makes us squeal. Little Alec Greven just published a book with Harper Collins called, “How To Talk To Girls.” In it he explains how a young gentleman can win the affections of his paramour on the playground, with such gems as “comb your hair and don’t wear sweats” and “if I say hi and you say hi back, we’re probably off to a good start.” He also warns his readers, “It is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry. Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil.” He advises, “The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don’t let them get to you.” HA! For the record, Alec is happily single, saying he is a little too young for actual dating. Call us in 10 years, cutie. And in the meantime, send us an IM — we have an open slot on our “Guys On Our IM” roster… [NY Post]