For The Week Of November 17-23, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Your drive will be tanking, as your energies get scattered. Instead of panicking and thinking the worst, take this as a sign to cool down and recollect yourself. If anything, this is a perfect opportunity to rekindle the magic with your baby and realize there is more to your life than just fighting for the finer things, but appreciating them too.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

You mind will be wandering far from your body; to get things to match up again, take a spontaneous trip. Even if time won’t allow anything major, just doing a sleep over at a friends will do the trick as anything that removes you from your day to day life will do wonders in putting you back in the right frame of mind to f**k and frolic the way you love it once again.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

It’ll be all out anarchy at Scorpio central this week. Your mind will run about with ambitious thoughts, your body consumed with more practical pursuits and then there’ll be your spirit. Seems your inner soul will be feeling a bit restless and a bout of wild curiosities will tempt you into all sorts of interesting turmoil. Yes, you know it, the bitch is back!

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

It’s your way or the highway and if your honeyman can’t get with that program, then he better reconsider who he is getting himself in deeper with. This isn’t your time to compromise and there’s no reason you should be. If anyone thinks they can interfere, well, that person has no idea who you really are and won’t ever. Accept that now and forever have your peace.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

A trip down memory lane can happen any moment, forcing you to have to rectify your past and deal with ongoing issues that are driving a big ole wedge into your love life. Although using this as your cushion to avoid anyone getting close to you has been a fun game of cat and mouse so far, things won’t be as cute going forward. Cease and desist those blocks now!

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Exploring new faces and different places will make for a big surge in your popularity, as long as you know how to spread your love around and work it, because sitting in one place too long won’t bode well for you, as going in too deep with anyone will cause friction and disinterest. You know it, it’s all about the superficialness this week, so live it, love it and OD on it.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Your motivation will be on the rise, but if you waste this energy towards your romance, rather than your career, you’ll be missing the boat of major opportunities to get to a new level in your life that can have you meeting a higher standard of men that will understand your dreams better and know how to support you. In other words, fight your instant gratification instinct!

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Your appetite for adventure will increase to a heightened level of excitement and make you horny for foreign meat. Break free of your confines and do all you can to get what you must, as tasting the pleasure of something out of your norm will be what satisfies you the most. If this means booking yourself a trip to a far away land, consider it foreplay for the best ride of your life.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You are under no obligation to have to tell whom ever you are sleeping with all you secrets, unless they are of the STD variety. Otherwise, having some mystery should be an enticement to keep the passion alive. However, playing this both ways is going to be necessary to make it work, as in accepting he’s got a few skeletons in his closet too.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Get off the fence and say, “Yes!” Whatever opportunities are coming your way in terms of partnership will only bring about luck. Sure, you have some issues with commitment, as in claustrophobia, but nothing ever has to be forever. Instead of trying to paint a big ugly picture, see it as pieces of a puzzle you want to sort out.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Changing up your routines will do wonders for your overall morale, as just thinking about a better life isn’t going to happen — that just isn’t how the laws of attraction work. To win it, you have to be in it. So, this means putting your feet in the water and not being afraid to get a little dirty. Besides, deep down what you truly do desire is a little filth.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Your libido will have a mind of its own and if you try stopping it from its path of destruction, you will only have yourself to blame, as it seems it will have an invincible power to see, aim, and conquer. So, just sit back, look pretty and follow those impulses, as it’ll give you all that you want and didn’t know you thought was so delectable.