The Breakup Diaries: Embracing The Grace Period

There are many post breakup stages that a person can feel — anger, sadness, resentment, hatred, insecurity, just to name a few. However, at some point, one of your bolder friends will make that typical fast fix suggestion that “the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.” Do I agree with this? Ehh. For some, a rebound only makes the split hurt more. I would suggest starting with a little flirting, maybe some kissing, and take it from there. But one thing I do believe in is “The Grace Period.” Breakups can be intense. They can take a toll on your mental psyche and emotional health. A whirlwind of feelings can break you down and the constant up and down of your mood levels can leave you exhausted. You need time to recover. How can one jump into a new relationship when they aren’t fully healed from the old one? Give yourself time to let all of that emotional baggage clear out. My parents always tell me to make something more important than my relationships with guys or just with friends.

My suggestions: Find a project you’re passionate about. Start going to the gym. Join a class. Read a new book. Catch up with friends you haven’t seen in awhile. Do something with your family. Get into a routine that’s about you. It’s okay to be selfish for a little while as you get back on your feet. Being a little selfish and self-sufficient seems to be underrated these days. Entertain having a crush and keep yourself open to flirting with new people, but don’t think you need to jump into something else just to feel secure again. You’re the only person who can really ensure your security.

Now I know some people are probably thinking “This is such typical advice! What do you know?” and they want to just lay on their couch watching “True Blood” re-runs while they dive into some Kraft mac ‘n’ cheese. That’s fine for a little while, but it’s not going to make you feel that much better in the long run. Take it from somebody who really doesn’t like to be alone. Embrace “The Grace Period” and you’ll find a little peace of mind. It’s a fact that when you’re at peace and happy with yourself, you are more attractive to others. And that is when it’s time to get back in the game.