Gossip Girl: The Only Thing That Can Take Out A Queen B Is A Queen S

Josh Schwartz is certainly turning up the heat. The media has been buzzing about the first three episodes of this season’s “Gossip Girl” as the best, but episode four had my best friend and I squealing from shock and awe.

First things first, OMFG Lord Marcus is banging his step mom Lady Catherine? Ew. Seriously, my jaw hit the coffee table — an awesome twist that I never saw coming. And Vanessa, you sly little bitch, intending to catch Nate and Catherine doing the dirty-dirty, but catching that shocker instead…good thing you thought to snap that photo.But here’s the thing — can we get a little communication going on in this show please? Note to Vanessa: Not everything you see is what you think. If Blair said she was going to handle it, she was going to handle it. Blair Waldorf never leaves unfinished business and she knows how to take down the upper echelon like nobody else. However, we may soon see a new queen taking over her throne; none other than her best friend, Serena Van Der Woodsen.

Serena was content as the passive but popular girl in season one when she was trying to create a positive image for herself and was too busy being in love with the boy from Brooklyn to care about the socialite world. But old habits die hard, and after being humiliated by Dan Humphrey, she’s back and ready to rule. And thank god. Sweet Serena sucks. We want the bitchy Serena from the “Gossip Girl” books, stat. Too bad for Blair that her minions are easily persuaded. My poor brunette bombshell is apparently going to be ousted from her title as ruler of Constance-Billard in the next few episodes, but I have faith she’ll make a comeback. She always does.

And to think that all of this was actually orchestrated by Chuck Bass. (Who, by the way, carried THE ULTIMATE MAN PURSE at the beginning of the episode — did anyone else catch it?) He set up Serena to get jealous and to seek revenge on Dan, all so he could see her return to her evil ways, rule the school, and push Blair out of the spotlight. I know Chuck thinks he’s smart in his schemes, but is Blair really going to love him after all this? Guess we’ll have to wait to find out…