“The Hills” Have Minimal Thrills

Every week I wonder why it is that I’m still watching and using coveted DVR space for The Hills. I’m sorry, maybe these girls are more interesting in real life, but NOTHING happens on this show. Last night I watched 22 minutes of Lauren deciding that she and Doug should just be friends. Seriously? I wanted to throw my remote at the TV when she was at dinner with Brody (looking way too done up and perfect) and he asked her about her bracelets. “These are my sparklies and these are my friendships.” Gag me LC, you sound like you are five-years-old. And having a friendship bracelet with Stephanie Pratt? Come on. Blood is thicker than water. I’m the youngest of five children, I would know. Spencer may be a grade-A douche bag, but Stephanie needs to show some loyalty.

The only reason to maybe watch this show is Kelly Cutrone. You know what? Scratch that — I think the show should be entirely about Kelly Cutrone. She is entertaining as hell. Last night’s comment to Whitney, about picking up models while on the job, cracked me up, “This is called multi-tasking in the power bitch world.” Loves it. Speaking of Whitney, I’m pretty sure she lied when she said she wasn’t in a sorority, considering we know more about these characters from the Internet, paparazzi and gossip than we see of them on the “reality show.” Anyway, next week’s episode does look appetizing — Brody calls Stephanie out on her shadiness and then gets thrown in the clink — so I think I’ll give it another shot. I wasn’t really giving it a fair chance…after all nobody could’ve really topped Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf last night.