Sex Advice: First Time Role-Player

“I want to start role-playing — how do I incorporate that into my regular sex life with my boyfriend since neither one of us has tried it before and want to start slow?” — Acting Up In Bed, via email

I think there’s two kinds of role-playing: theatrical and emotional. For example, the theatrical would be the two of you dressing up like a nurse and patient and pretending to do it on the operating table. For emotional, you would pretend to be a hooker and your boyfriend a John. Instead of costumes, you focus on the emotional side of the fantasy. If it’s the latter, I think the best way to start slowly is through verbal communication. If you’re into being taken advantage of, have your boyfriend start by telling you exactly what he wants you to do. Then maybe you can tell him you’re “at his beck and call” (think Pretty Woman). The more comfortable you get with it, the further into the fantasy you can get.

If that’s not you’re cup of tea and you’d rather just dress up, try buying a nurse or pirate costume at the local Halloween store. Want to take that slowly? Start off just wearing an eye patch. You can work up to the moustache and billowy shirt.

Got a burning question for our amazingly wise Nookie Know-It-All? Email it to [email protected] Don’t worry, we’ll keep your deets between us.

A Note On Playing It Safe: The Frisky thinks safe sex is smart sex – so please practice it in the way that’s right for your relationship.