Weird Marriage Laws That We Just Don’t Understand

Jenn Thompson at Mental Floss is on a roll! After yesterday’s “Origin of Wedding Traditions” article, today she’s got a follow-up on wedding laws that are still on the books. Would be guilty or not guilty of these ridiculous crimes?
1. In North Carolina, it’s against the law to check into a hotel room pretending you’re married. But what about all the harmless husband and wife role-playing games? Verdict: GUILTY.
2. In South Carolina, if a guy over 16 proposes to an unwed woman with no intention of marrying her, he’s committed a misdemeanor under the Offenses Against Morality and Decency. Boys, you cannot propose marriage as a means of seduction! Verdict: Well, it’s never happened to us, not that we would ever agree to marry someone we hadn’t already been seduced by.

3. In Montana, two people can get married even if neither party is present because the marriage is conducted by proxy. This is pretty popular with couples in the military. Verdict: Hmm, this sounds kind of fabulous for myself and the man-friend. We can go out to dinner, avoid the stress of a wedding, and let all our friends watch two totally random people get hitched for us!

4. Alabama is surprisingly pro-woman, or at least pro-women’s greed. The state allows women to keep any and all possessions accumulated before their marriage in the event of a divorce, but doesn’t have the same law for men. Therefore women can appeal to get their ex’s junk during the divorce proceedings, but the guys cannot. Bummer. Verdict: Ha! Like I would want his replica of an ancient Samurai sword! The plasma TV on the other hand….

5. In New Orleans, of all places, it’s illegal for a palm reader, fortune teller, or other such person to offer up their marriage services. Verdict: Well guess that means Kiki T, our Astrosexologist, can’t marry me during Mardi Gras!