I blame Gwyneth Paltrow circa 1997 for why I do not have the balls to cut my hair. Back during my senior year of high school, when I was zitty and spectacled and decidedly not cute, I decided it would do much for my self-esteem to chop my hair off like the then-girlfriend of Brad Pitt. You remember the cut right? I think it was bigger than The Rachel. Anyway, when you’re not as pretty as Gwynnie, a dramatic cut does not necessarily work and I spent the next bazillion years of my life growing it out. Now it’s absurdly long but I cannot bring myself to chop it off, though I so so so so love short hair cuts — from little pixies like Rihanna’s to chic and sleek bobs like Gwyneth Paltrow. Instead, I admire from afar.