Email Order Baby Brides

While my Jewish mother would do almost anything to marry me off, apparently I should thank my lucky stars that she hasn’t put me up for sale! Although, I’m already past peak for this eBay-style site of teen brides — MarryOurDaughter.com. On the page, parents advertise their young daughters and sell them through an online form to turn a profit. Like happy mother, “Mrs. James P”, who wrote this testimonial: “Our 15-year old daughter Mary wasn’t very popular and did nothing but mope around the house bringing everybody down, so we decided to marry her off through your site. Now our house is a lot cheerier and we love our new swimming pool and Jacuzzi! We’ve told our youngest that when she turns 15 we’re going to marry her off too!” Satisfaction guaranteed has never sounded so disgusting. [Via Nerve Scanner]