He’s Just Not That Into (Having Sex With) You

Two books out this month assert that women aren’t the ones to blame when a marriage is sexless—sometimes it’s the man’s fault. According to one survey mentioned in He’s Just Not Up For It Anymore, 40 million Americans live in a no- or low-sex marriage (a sexless marriage is defined as having sex 10 times a year or less, SYK). The reasons guys aren’t into doing it with their wives vary—68 percent indicated that it was because his wife wasn’t sexually adventurous enough for him, while less than 1 percent said it was because he’s gay. He’s Just Not Up For It Anymore seems to address the “why” of it (or at least that’s what it seems after reading the first chapter on ABC.com). Michele Weiner Davis’ book The Sex-Starved Wife seems to address the “how to fix it” angle. Her solution is to have sex. Davis told Chicago, “Sometimes you’re not in the mood or the right frame of mind, but if you can be receptive to being stimulated, once you get going, it really feels good.” We feel the same way about going to the gym. [ABC News and Chicago]