Odds Still In Divorce’s Favor

The latest U.S. Census has been released and there’s news! First, what’s good: Divorce rates have leveled off in the last few years — Hooray! But they still suck — Boo! Seventy-percent of couples who married after 1970 made it to their tenth anniversary, but, unfortunately, many marriages are ending in divorce after the first decade. Still, the experts think that the increased number of divorces in the last 30 years has a little less to do with people being cheaters and liars and scammers and flakes and quitters and more to do with the fact that in the ’50s — when only weirdos did it — divorce was harder to get, expensive, and majorly frowned upon. Chances are those couples were totally miserable, too. Nowadays, the potential that your blissfully sweet (for now) relationship could go kaput is just another inevitable part of getting married in the first place, like dwindling sex, growing beer bellies, and the Crate & Barrel catalog. And with divorce comes something marriage just doesn’t offer — upgrades. As my own boyfriend and potential future husband/ex-husband/alimony payer says about Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, “She’s right about my second wife’s age.” Watch it ladies, I’ve already got dibs on Kingston Rossdale. [USA Today]